1. A deposition is not a conversation. A deposition is when the other side's attorney sits opposite you at a table and asks you questions, the answers to which are made under penalty of perjury and recorded by a court reporter. The attorney can ask you about ANYTHING that could lead to admissible evidence at trial. In other words, they can ask you about just about everything, and you have to answer. If you are a party to the case, that deposition can be used in court to contradict your testimony at trial or in place of your testimony at trial. It's that important. It is also the only time that the other side's attorney gets to speak directly to you. Here's what we've learned in the Trenches - if we treat the deposition as a conversation, you will too. You will talk to us like you talk to your friends and acquaintances. You will drop your guard, and you will say things that aren't entirely accurate or that you wouldn't have said if your guard was up, because that's how regular conversations go. A deposition is not a conversation; it is court testimony in an informal setting. Treat it that way, and you won't learn an unfortunate lesson at trial.
2. Completing discovery isn't optional. I know that answering interrogatories and producing documents is a massive pain in the posterior (remember, I was a client once too). It seems ridiculous to you to provide every darn document requested and overwhelming to answer every interrogatory fully. Do it anyway. Let me say that again - Do it anyway. If you don't answer every question completely, if you don't provide every document requested, and then try to introduce at trial information or documents that should have been provided but weren't, you will get a nasty surprise. Your information or your document may not be admitted at trial, and if its an important piece of evidence, that preclusion could cost you a decision in your favor. If that happens, it's no one's fault but yours.
3. Monitor your electronics. We are so electronically connected these days that sometimes it's hard to remember everything that has a password. Sure, most people remember to change the password on their email and their social media accounts, but what about Alexa, your Nest thermostat, your Ring doorbell, your digital door lock, your security camera? Did you know those all could be used to spy on you or to drive you a bit crazy? Do you have your computer open while you're talking to your paramour? Are you sure no one has hacked into the computer's camera and microphone? Is the GPS enabled on the phone that's on your spouse's cell phone plan? Is your iPad password protected -are files you don't want your children (or spouse) to see separately protected?
4. Monitor your online presence. I love the phrase that is being shared on social media - "Dance like no one is watching. Post on social media like it will be an exhibit at your deposition." Enough said.
5. A text is not an oral conversation. It is a writing. It is not a "he said; she said." It is evidence of what was said, every much as is an email. Treat your texts as if they will be evidence at your trial. Don't call your spouse names. Don't rant. Think before you text. It is so much easier to press "send" in a text than in an email, and for that reason, many people send texts in the heat of the moment. Don't. It will come back to haunt you. Be businesslike and polite and you won't go wrong.
Learn these 5 lessons of the Trenches and you can concentrate on mastering the bigger life lessons. Here in the Trenches.
P.S. If you don't recognize the picture, it's from the scene in "My Fair Lady" when Audrey Hepburn finally "gets' her diction correct.
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