Do Disney Princesses Have Expectations?

May we talk a little bit more about managing expectations?  This weekend is the Disney Princess Half Marathon Weekend.  I am running in the Inaugural Glass Slipper Challenge - a 10k on Saturday, followed by the half marathon on Sunday.  Yes, both in costume.  I'll post pictures, I promise.  This year, the friend who was going to run with me last year and my daughter are running as well.  I have three expectations for these races - I am going to finish, I will not injure myself, and most of all, I will have fun.  I don't care how fast (or slow) I run.  I'm there for the experience and the friends and family.  This attitude worked great last year.  I was ridiculously slow, but I finished and had fun.

My friend is Competitive with a capital "C".  She is fierce.  It serves her very well here in the Trenches.  It scares her to death thinking of the race.  She was not born a runner, and in fact, until yours truly stuck the idea of the Disney Princess into her head, she'd probably never thought about running.  Now, she really likes it.  Problem is that she's not finished a race.  She knows how she is - did I mention she's fierce?  She's worried she won't be successful at Disney.  She won't finish.  It scares her.  Running both the 10k and the half were overwhelming.  She recognized what was happening, and decided her goal was to run the 10k.  She would do as much of the half marathon as she could, and if they picked her up off the course because she was too slow, it was OK.  Daughter and I are going to run with her on the 10k.  We'll all get across the finish line.....and we'll have fun doing it.  I'm really proud of her.  Why?  Because she adjusted her expectations.  She looked at where she was in her training and ability and realized that if she continued to push to run both races, she would finish neither.  What's more, she would make herself miserable and the racing experience would be no fun.  She did what a normal, healthy and rational person would do - she adjusted her expectations to fit the reality of the situation.  The 10k will be a challenge, but in a good way.  My friend will have lots of fun and test herself in the process.  All is right with the world.

Here in the Trenches, our clients are faced with challenges.  Their lives are changing in ways they never imagined.  It all feels overwhelming.  Unlike my friend, however, they are not rational.  Their emotions are raw; their nerves are shot.  They want it all.  They are afraid to settle for less than they need.  They can't think clearly, at least not on their own.  They need help to calmly examine their options.  They need guidance to weigh the pros and cons.  They want someone to help them do what my friend did all on her own - adjust their expectations so they can determine what they need and how to get it.  That's what we do; act as their guide and help them develop realistic expectations.  Here in the Trenches.