Balance in All Things

"I often see people getting so immersed and involved in their children’s happiness, 

that they seem to lose sight of their own." 

 I had a chance to visit with an acquaintance I see periodically, but not often.  I first met him when he was married and his son was a small child.  Over the years, he divorced, and his son grew into a man.  When we talked recently, he said that he never missed a day or even an hour of time with his son.  Not only did he never miss a ball game or a school play, but he also never went out on a date or out with friends when his son was with him.  His son was with him a lot.  Now, his son is grown and he's alone. He doesn't regret a moment he spent with his son, but he's mighty lonely.  His son has a life, but he doesn't.   As divorced parents, we miss so much of our children's lives when they're with the other parent.  It's natural not to want to lose even one moment they're with us.  I wonder, however, if we're doing ourselves or our children any favors.  Our children learn they're the center of our existences, sure, but I think they know it anyway.  What I worry about is teaching them that they are the only people who matter to us, and that they never have to share our attentions.   I worry that it teaches them that its OK to expect to have our undivided attention 24/7, and what effect that lesson will have on their ability to form healthy adult relationships, especially after they have their own children.  I also worry about their parents, and their loneliness as they age and their children move on to lives of their own.  Will the children remember their parents' sacrifice for them?  I hope so, but I don't think they can, really.  Balance in everything.  Here in the Trenches.