When I travel to see Mom, I don't have access to a gym. I asked my most fabulous personal trainer (who, coincidentally, is Daughter. Yes, that's her in the picture) for a travel workout. She devised a workout for me that uses no weight other than my body weight. Do I need to tell you it kicked my butt worse than the gym workouts she devises for me (the answer is no if you are my FB friend and saw my post complaining about my sadistic personal trainer)? What did this teach me? First, that I am obviously not lifting heavy enough in my gym workouts. Second, and most importantly, that sometimes less is more.
It is that second lesson that reminds me of all of you in the Trenches. A lot of people think that when they find themselves in the Trenches, they need an attorney with lots of extra firepower. By "extra firepower," I mean a firm with an impressive name, with lots of attorneys, and in which their attorney has associate attorneys helping them along with a fleet of paralegals and assistants. Some folks think bigger and impressive is better than a solo attorney or someone in a small firm. It's kind of like how impressive it looks when Daughter lifts those big heavy weights on her website (and she is really impressive - the picture at the top of this post is her squatting @135lbs), versus how I look doing the same exercise without added weight. Does it mean that Daughter is getting a better workout than me? Not any more than it means that the folks who hire those big impressive firms are getting better representation.
As we head into the holidays, some folks will decide that this holiday will be their last one with their spouse. Those folks will start to look for an attorney to help them. That makes the message of this post extremely timely. When looking for a family law attorney, fit and philosophy are more important than anything else (except, of course, competence, which is not always a given). When you are in the Trenches, your life is laid bare before your attorney. You want to feel comfortable sharing your deepest, darkest secrets with that person. You want to feel confident that they have your back. You want to know they will give you advice you can live with. You want to know that they will approach your case in a way that is comfortable for you. You want to feel comfortable raising concerns and asking questions. You want to be confident in their answers. This is your life, and you will have to live it long after the attorney has moved on to other clients. Bigger is not necessarily better. More is not always more. One size does not fit all. Here in the Trenches.