Life is all about what you will tolerate and what you won't. Most people tolerate a lot of things in their marriage. That's part of living with another person. When the marriage is going well, it's no big deal to tolerate imperfections or different ways of doing things. When a marriage is ending, all those little things are major annoyances. Then, when a couple separates, things are usually not just as perfect as either of them wants - more tolerations.
This is what I want you to do. Make a list of all the things that aren't as you want, but that you're tolerating. It will be a very long list, trust me. Some of them will be big and others will be small. Now, get to work getting rid of them, one at a time. When you're here in the Trenches, you have no control over whether you're getting a divorce, you may be in a process which gives you no control, and your life is changing in unexpected ways. Here's a place you can exercise some control. It will make you feel better, and make all the rest of the things you can't control tolerable. Trust me. Give it a try. Here in the Trenches.