The Wedding Bell Blues?

My cousin is getting married!  I'm so excited for her.  I'm not so excited for her mother, my aunt.  It is tough being the mother of the bride, no matter if you're planning, paying for or just being in the wedding party.  As the mom of one of the guests of honor, a lot of eyes are on you - and a lot of people are judging how you look (admit it, you check out what the mothers are wearing).  My aunt is not your traditional mother of the bride.  She never wears dresses, in fact in almost forty years, I have only seen her in a dress maybe twice, and one of those times was in her own wedding.  Most mothers of the bride wear dresses, and this fact is causing both my aunt and cousin a lot of stress.  My aunt wants to look beautiful for her daughter's big day, but she also wants to be comfortable in her skin.  My cousin also wants mom to look beautiful, but she's concerned that pants may not be formal enough.  My aunt is nothing if not determined to look beautiful her way.  My mom, my aunt and I spent almost an entire day searching online for an appropriate outfit.  Still nothing purchased, but she's getting closer to finding an outfit that pleases both her and her daughter.

I know, I appear to be reaching for a connection to the Trenches, but bear with me.  When clients come into the Trenches, many times they think a divorce is a divorce is a divorce.  If their friend was married 30 years, stayed home for 20 and got a significant alimony award, and they were also married 30 years and stayed home for 20, then they should get at least the same significant alimony award.  Easy, peasy, breezy.  Unfortunately, that's not how it works.  Every divorce, like every wedding, is unique.  No two people and no two marriages are alike.  It follows therefore, that every divorce would also be different.  And so they are. You did your wedding your way, in a manner that speaks to you.  That also how you should handle your divorce.  Here in the Trenches.