One Thing At A Time

Tackle one thing at a time.  Did your mother tell you this?  Mine did.  What she meant was to break things down into manageable pieces and tackle them one at a time.  You feel less overwhelmed, and more able to focus on the task at hand.  Well, my apologies to Mom, but in the Trenches, that advice may very well come back to haunt you.  Many of our clients are emotionally overwhelmed when they are going through a divorce or separation, and it is very tempting to listen to Mom and just handle what they have to now, and put off other things for later, when emotions have cooled and they can think more clearly.  That may be a mistake. What clients don't understand is that once the court makes a decision or people reach an agreement which is incorporated in a court order, everything from the past is done and over.  That court decision or order becomes the new starting point.   That he was a lousy father before doesn't matter if now he's a paragon of virtue; her fiscal irresponsibility is as nothing in the face of her new pecuniary accountability.  They simply don't matter except as a bit of historical perspective.  So, although it may seem like too heavy a load to bear, and too difficult a task, if a client wants to move back to their home state with the children, or thinks they should have indefinite rather than rehabilitative alimony, they need to bite off more than they can chew (to quote Mom again), and ask for it before that first order is entered.        Waiting until the time is right may be too late.