Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Divorce and The Bosu Ball

I wanted a Bosu ball.  As you may know from reading this post, I run, swim and do yoga.  My balance isn't so hot, and I thought a Bosu Ball would help.  I thought it would really improve my exercise routine and imp roe my fitness.  I wanted a Bosu ball.  I read all about them.  I read about all of the benefits of exercising with it.  I watched You Tube videos about it.  Still, I hesitated.  Was it really right for me?  Would it really improve my exercise routine or just sit there unused?  I pondered these questions for a couple of years.  Then, this Christmas, I received $100 in Target gift cards.  A Bosu ball is $100, so I bought one on Saturday.  I brought it home and blew it up.  There, it sat in my living room, looking just the picture.  I couldn't wait to use it.  Being the cautious person I am, I watched the DVD that came with it.  They showed the exercises with a youngish, fit woman, and an older than me woman doing the exercises with modifications.  I was ready to try it.  I stepped up on the ball.  I wobbled - a lot.  I stayed on.  So far, so good.  Then I turned my head first to one side and then to the other - slowly.  I fell off.  Yes, I fell off.  It wasn't as easy as it looked.  I wobbled some more and practiced.  After half an hour, I could turn my head without falling.  Then I tried squats  That ball kicked my butt.  I tried some more, then I took a break until Sunday, when I tried again.  Again, not pretty.  It is going to take quite some time before I look as good on that ball as the older lady, much less the fit younger one.  It wasn't what I expected.  It was different.  It will take some time to get used to it being other than I expected, but I will.

My Bosu ball experience is just like a divorce.  Most people think about divorcing way before they actually separate.  They read books about divorce.  They talk to friends.  They think about it some more.  They do some more reading.  Maybe they go to see a lawyer.  Still, they worry whether divorce is right for them.  What will it do to their lives and those of the rest of their family?  Is it the right choice for them?  Are there other alternatives that will solve their problems?   They are not sure.  It's a big decision, so they think some more.  Eventually, they decide that divorce is what they want.  They go through the process of separating and divorcing.  It is never exactly how it appears in the books and in their friend's lives.  It's different.  For one, their feelings are all their own, and affect how they handle all the changes divorce and separation bring.  They lose their balance, they fall off the ball.  They keep working at it, and one day they balance without falling.  Another day, they do something they never thought they would do.  It feels different than what they expected, but it's still good.  It works for them.  Just like my Bosu ball will work for me.  Here in the Trenches.

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