Wednesday, July 18, 2012

It's Idiopathic

Back to last Friday (I told you it was a full day!) of my good friends here in the Trenches had a heart "incident."  Really scary.  After a lovely overnight hospital stay with lots of tests, my friend went home with a diagnosis of idiopathic cardiomyopathy.  In plain English, that's doctor speak for "We know something went on with your heart, but for the life of us, we can't figure out why."  What does that mean for my friend?  It means that even though the doctors don't know what caused the problem and they sent my friend home, there's still a problem on which they need to keep an eye.  What the heck does this have to do with the Trenches?  Plenty, as it so happens.  I can't tell you the number of clients who walk into my office who say that their spouse came home, and "out of the blue" told them they wanted a divorce.  They are floored, and can't figure out why their marriage is ending.  To them, it's idiopathic, and for some, it will remain that way.   Does that make it any less real?  Heavens no.   Unfortunately, even if the client doesn't understand why their spouse wants the divorce, they still have to deal with it.  Like with my friend, it's harder to treat something when you don't know the cause,  but you still can't ignore it.  Luckily for us in the Trenches, unlike my friend's doctors, even when we don't know why a marriage ends, we can still help our clients handle the emotions and the custody and financial issues that come with it.  It's a whole lot harder when our clients don't understand the reason for the divorce, but part of our job is helping them come to terms with the realities of their spouse's decision and move forward with their lives.  Here in the Trenches.

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